dread.

i know i have gained weight. i know.

i don't think i can get on the scale for a week. i need to diet & exercise, then weight myself so the bitter truth won't be as difficult to swallow.

i have enjoyed myself. a lot.

even though we did a great deal of exercising with what's been happening with weight-loss...I don't think that's going to cut it for maintenance.

since before the wedding i was having a difficult time losing weight (or even a difficult time not gaining), i'm worried my last 2 week "off my diet" regimine has kicked my rear.

i really wish i could take 3 - 6 months off of work and solely focus on this and get this conquered.

i'm not really sure what to do...what direction to go. i'm thinking lots of fruits and veggies throughout the day and a lean protein dinner...and lots of exercise.

i am finding it difficult to find the motivation to do medifast.

kind of sad tonight. frustrated. disappointed and a little lost.

i hope i can get things going in the right direction.

so tired of even thinking about this.

i know i can do it. i just want to get it done already!